I'm Jumping on the Blog train!

I have a couple of friends that do this blog thing and I enjoy reading their posts. They're always so interesting, informative and provocative.

I've thought "Hm, I might give blogging a go" but , frankly, I'm not very political OR computer literate. Fortunately, my husband is both, so I know I'll have help.

I AM very conservative and have no troubles expressing my thoughts along those lines, so I suppose whatever I pop out with is what I pop out with!

Speaking of which...

My family spent part of this weekend working at our church festival. My husband spent all day in the kitchen (nothing sexier than a man in a kitchen!). My daughters worked the face painting booth and my friend and I sold concessions in the tent that had the most direct sunlight in the whole place! The evening was topped off by three hours of bingo (we didn't win a dime). We had FUN!

I enjoyed seeing all of the families walking around. Young couples with children in strollers. Empty nesters enjoying each others company. Grandparents, their adult children and all the grandkids meeting up to play bingo. Friends gathering and just spending time together. This is my kind of event!

Frequently I think "what on earth has become of our family system". We used to have roots, spend time with each other, gather for a meal, spend a day just watching movies together.

I know, in part, what has happened and can relate to a bit of it. Yes, it's two full-time working parents. I KNOW, I KNOW! Both parents have to work full-time to keep the money ball rolling. I, myself, work part-time. It certainly benefits our family and I am very thankful for the fact that my five hours a day are while my children are in school. I see them off and I'm there when they get home.

Several years ago a friend of mine, who has four children, told me that her mother never seemed to have time for her when she was growing up. She always wished she could spend just a little alone time with her mom. One day, out of the blue, her mother pulled out a kitchen stool, scooped her up on to it and said "let's make cookies!".

This was the only memory my friend had of truly spending time with her mother. She was 35 years old when she told me this. It made me sad for her. I remember hundreds of times making cookies with my mom, just the two of us going to the grocery together, mom doing "cafeteria duty" twice a month at my elementary school. I was always so excited to see her there!

Mom is a realtor. She became one in the early 70's when housewives were jumping on the real estate wagon. She had to carry her typewriter and multiple carbon copy contracts with her wherever she went. She chose this particular profession because she felt she could earn extra money for our family and still be a cafeteria mom, girl scout mom, car pool mom. She did a magnificent job! As I grew older I realized that she worked really hard, not just a real estate, but as a mom as well.

Do you know what? I still enjoy spending time with my mother. We're comfortable together. I don't feel like there is an elderly stranger in my life, or someone who now needs care and it's a pain in the neck.
Yes, she needs occasional help to go to doctors appointments or shopping; but I see this time with her as a privilege.

With our four children my husband and I take them for "special time" to spend time with each one individually. It doesn't have to break the bank. We can go get a snow cone and go to the dollar movie and they love it! Yes, they even enjoy just that little trip to the grocery store when it is just the two of us.

Of course we all ache for our own quiet time on occasion. As adults we need that time to re-focus. I enjoy having the occasional "girls night out" or a rare weekend get-a-way. My husband likes to go on the occasional hunting trip. Neither of us begrudges the other that time and we think that it makes us better parents as well as a better couple. Naturally, there is "date night" too! You have to take time to enjoy your spouse and re-visit the dating days of yore! After 23 years of marriage we can still put on a smooch in front of our kids that makes them say "eeeewwww!"

Several years ago Iris Krasnow wrote a book called Surrendering to Motherhood.
Here is a little bit about Iris and her book

"We can always go back to our big jobs; we can never go back to the times when our children were young and needy. Soon, too soon, your cuddly babies will be stubble-faced teenagers going off to college. So be there, now, as much as you can," writes Krasnow, formerly the national feature writer for United Press International. Now an author and professor in the School of Communications at American University, Krasnow left her job in daily journalism when, at the age of 39, she gave birth to twins and she and her husband were suddenly parents of four sons, ages three and under. Her children captured her, forcing her to, happily, climb down the ladder into her messy kitchen and living room As she writes: "Having small kids is like the last day of summer vacation, when you are savoring ever second coming at you, when you merge with that wonderful, intense, central part of Being -- the sun on your face, the sand at your feet. My children finally forced me to stop, to be present in the present, and to be happy at that destination. Immersed in the glory of my kids, I abandoned the relentless desire to climb higher and higher."

It is a joy to me to read about women whose families are a joy to them!